About a week ago

I want to go to Canberra to buy fireworks.

For reals? That's my hood! I'll go with you and show you why Canberra is awesome.

That sounds good. Road trip!

Woo! Road trip!

Saturday

Hai. I'm here to pick you up for the road trip to Canberra.

Woo! Road trip!

[prescient]
I sure hope the car holds out.
[/prescient]

We are in Canberra, which is a lot like heaven, if you adhere to David Byrne's definition of heaven as a place where nothing, nothing ever happens.

We leave Canberra.

Hey, did someone throw maple syrup at the windshield?

I don't think that's too likely.

Motherfucker.

Hmm, that maple syrup smells like burning...

Two hours later

Do you think I should tip the RACV guys?

Do what your heart tells you.

I only have fifties, anyway.

I have some change if you like.

Naw, I can just tip them with you.

...



Let us never speak of this again.